Saturday, March 23, 2013

pumpkin eater.



So I'm about to cheat.  I'm really sorry and I'm a horrible person but I've been so busy today that I don't have time to write a good blog post.  I promise promise promise that tomorrow I will write you a lovely post that you'll probably print off and put in your scrapbook.  But today I am cheating and I am re-posting a post that I wrote in the beginning of 2011.  Reading it now I'm like, I am the weirdest person.  But at the time I thought it was one MILLION hilarious, so we're just going to go with it.

And seriously, I have things I want to write about so I'm bummed that I just don't have time today. I'm probably going to go cry a river about it or something.

Also, since this post is originally from 2011, it seemed only fitting that I post a picture from that same time.  In this picture I hope to remind you of two things: 1) I did weird editing to photos back in the day (seriously, this picture is like super intense style) and 2) I am super one MILLION white.  But of course, we hadn't ever forgotten that, now had we?

Commencing old post:

So this morning I had to do the work thing.  I'm not going to say it, but I'm going to say it:  I've worked three out of the last four Saturdays.  There is no justice in this world.  Okay, that's a lie.

So, I'm sitting there thinking about how I hate the copier in C-114 as well as the one in C-111 and how I think Sue's note on the copier is funny.  I'm also thinking about how the upcoming seminar speaker has a nice background to the picture of him I'm putting in a brochure.  It's like brown-blue-gray tie-dye. (OH SHOOT.  LIGHT BULB IN MY HEAD.  I always understood that the "dye" part of tie-dye was because you dye it (they don't call me a genius for nothing'...) but I just barely, right now, this very second figured out that they probably use the word "tie" because you tie it before you dye it. Holy cow.  This is incredible.   Why has no one ever explained that to me?  I don't know what to do with myself.  This is literally blowing my mind.  Literally. Yes, there is a fan in my head and it is blowing my mind to the back of my skull.  It's a little weird.)

Okay, sorry.  Back to tie-dye man.  He looks pleasant enough.  So I'm still thinking (surprise, suprise...) because I'm all alone in the office and the copier upsets me so I want to think about something else.  Don't ask me how my train of thought got to this, but then I was thinking about how I have to alphabetize papers and how annoying it is when people don't staple their papers even though I've made like 37289 signs on neon paper with 38294037 flashing lights and 327489035 dancing chihuahuas standing next to those signs telling them to PLEASE, I beg of you:  STAPLE YOUR DANG PAPERS!

So maybe I go a little overboard sometimes.  What can I say?  I'm passionate about what I do.

Any dang way, I'm thinking about how annoying it is and how I wish all those non-staplers would come to the office so I could say to each of them, "Girl, you trippin'" or "Boy, you trippin'" or if if they have one of those names that works for both girls and boys and it's a little hard to tell which they are when they come in, I could say "Human, you trippin'."  I don't really know what good it would do me to say that, but please just picture it.  There would be a lot of people tripping.

So I'm sitting there chuckling to myself when Dr. G walks in. He asks me "What's with the headband?" which I take in stride because I'll be honest, I wasn't a huge fan of it myself and because I can always count on him to compliment me when I wear something cute, so I guess I should let him take a jab or two when my outfit just isn't working out.  I suppose the fact that I'm wearing the same shirt I wore three days ago wasn't helping either, but oh well.  So I tell him it's because I didn't take a shower, which was a little weird and a little more than he probably cared to know, but since he was being honest, I figured I should be, too.

Gosh, it is seriously impossible for me to get to the point of this blog post.  But don't worry, we're getting close.

So, he walked back into his officeand I went back to thinking .  All of a sudden, I started thinking about how hilarious it would be if Dr. G said things like, "Girl, you trippin'."  Then I thought about Sue saying it with some serious attitude and the two-finger point.  Then Peggy was in my mind telling all kinds of students that they were trippin', and then for some reason Dr. G was wearing a gangster outfit and some stunna shades while Marcia was beat-boxing and Dr. B was laying down a nice rap.  Dr. W was standing in the back because he's tall, so he was just waving his arm back and forth over the rest of them and now Wayne has his tall tee on and let me tell you, that man can bust a move in my mind and then I'm just a little confused because the entire department office just started a rap battle with all the students who were trippin'.

So, the moral of the story is that I shouldn't work so many Saturdays because it only leads to people ghost ridin' the whip in my mind.

1 comment:

danielle said...

Man, younger Stacy was cray cray. I'm so glad you moved in with me so I could help you mature and learn social skills and such. You're so very lucky.